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		Citybreaks Spend half your precious three-day break getting there and coming back; struggle to reach your 6:30am flight at an airport that calls itself London but is actually in Norfolk, to get somewhere that calls itself Venice but is actually in Switzerland. Then realise you have seen everything in the first hour. The travel agent literature for Bruges claims: 'Throughout the year streams of tourists photograph its beautiful buildings and wander in and out of the chocolate and lace shops.' As anyone who has wandered in and out of chocolate and lace shops will tell you, it doesn't take very long; and once really is enough. After spinning out your stroll to the point where you hit The Wall and start burning your own body fat, you realise that there's nothing else to do for the remainder of your stay except drink heavily and / or row with your travelling partner.
				Some shit things: Prince Andrew Bratz Charity, Trips of a lifetime for Che Guevara merchandise Citybreaks ‘Contemporary’, the word Football pundits 'Having one of those days?' advertising James Blunt Lemsip Richard Littlejohn, gays constantly sharking after Some clips from the audiobook: Delicatessen counters at supermarkets Election planes Global warming sceptics Interactive media Nu-snobbery